that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
Two words: blizzard sex
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
