I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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