ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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