Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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