where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
you have to choose: penises or morals?
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
