drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
My liver is screaming fuck you right now.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize