I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
