There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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