how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
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