i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
