I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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