What part of "waking up in the crawl space of my house with a raccoon" sounds like a good night to you?
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
