We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Randomize
