Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Randomize