why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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