the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Randomize
