Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
