How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize