Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
