You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
