I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
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