I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
Randomize
