I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
