You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
even my farts smell like vagina
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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