Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
just balanced a champagne glass on my gut. thanks to beer im a living breathing tempur-pedic mattress.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
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