Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
Randomize
