WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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