well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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