just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
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