So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
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