lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
