Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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