she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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