Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
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