its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
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