well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ripped my favorite jeans crossing that fence
That sucks
It's an upgrade! I didn;t even have to unzip my pants to pee!
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
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