it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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