Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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