Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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