tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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