I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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