i would punch a child for taco bell
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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