there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
πππ what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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