There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
Randomize
