She announced her abortion via fbk
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
