Texts From Last Night

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  (269): View more from Michigan

  You're my little dorito

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  (269): You're my little dorito http://tfl.nu/8gay
  Replies (4) Good night (1755) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.

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  (215): After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk. (610): I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect. http://tfl.nu/dim5
  Replies (43) Good night (14338) Bad night (1126)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.

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  (812): There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better. http://tfl.nu/hacu
  Replies (11) Good night (2552) Bad night (1166)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life

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  (636): Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life http://tfl.nu/x73d
  Replies (45) Good night (8605) Bad night (794)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich

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  (605): I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich http://tfl.nu/py2d
  Replies (23) Good night (4043) Bad night (1360)
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!

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  (267): The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering! http://tfl.nu/inse
  Replies (45) Good night (7135) Bad night (748)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.

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  (812): After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women. http://tfl.nu/7qhk
  Replies (55) Good night (5697) Bad night (1503)
• Favorite

  (613): View more from Ontario

  i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer

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  (613): i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer http://tfl.nu/3jhr
  Replies (7) Good night (3897) Bad night (1000)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again

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  (734): of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again http://tfl.nu/rl6w
  Replies (19) Good night (1825) Bad night (688)
• Favorite

  (802): View more from Vermont

  He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow

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  (802): He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow http://tfl.nu/7xi8
  Replies (18) Good night (3235) Bad night (810)
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!

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  (509): It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me! http://tfl.nu/u8n7
  Replies (2) Good night (1236) Bad night (554)
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.

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  (705): I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep. http://tfl.nu/bmha
  Replies (3) Good night (649) Bad night (1077)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.

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  (310): I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it. http://tfl.nu/9g38
  Replies (0) Good night (800) Bad night (383)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum

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  (913): I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum http://tfl.nu/ad9i
  Replies (8) Good night (1147) Bad night (327)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.

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  (813): Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to. http://tfl.nu/wkiq
  Replies (3) Good night (259) Bad night (464)

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