hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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