Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize
