I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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