We need to rekindle our bromance
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Randomize
