I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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