Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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